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You'll Do

A History of Marrying for Reasons Other Than Love

ebook
0 of 1 copy available
0 of 1 copy available
An illuminating and thought-provoking examination of the uniquely American institution of marriage, from the Colonial era through the #MeToo age
Perfect for fans of Rebecca Solnit and Rebecca Traister

Americans hold marriage in such high esteem that we push people toward it, reward them for taking part in it, and fetishize its benefits to the point that we routinely ignore or excuse bad behavior and societal ills in the name of protecting and promoting it.
In eras of slavery and segregation, Blacks sometimes gained white legal status through marriage.
Laws have been designed to encourage people to marry so that certain societal benefits could be achieved: the population would increase, women would have financial security, children would be cared for, and immigrants would have familial connections.
  As late as the Great Depression, poor young women were encouraged to marry aged Civil War veterans for lifetime pensions.
The widely overlooked problem with this tradition is that individuals and society have relied on marriage to address or dismiss a range of injustices and inequities, from gender- and race-based discrimination, sexual violence, and predation to unequal financial treatment.
  One of the most persuasive arguments against women's right to vote was that marrying and influencing their husband's choices was just as meaningful, if not better.
Through revealing storytelling, Zug builds a compelling case that when marriage is touted as “the solution” to such problems, it absolves the government, and society, of the responsibility for directly addressing them.
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    • Kirkus

      November 1, 2023
      An exploration of "the instrumental use of marriage." Zug, a professor of family law, examines in lively detail the prevalence of "blatantly transactional marriages," unions entered into because of financial or legal benefits. Drawing on sources including court cases, historical anecdotes, and her own family's history, she provides ample evidence to show how generations of American men and women have used marriage "to combat racial, gender, and class discrimination," gain money or status, ensure their parental rights, and even elude criminal prosecution. If "gold-diggers"--Melania Trump is Zug's most recent example--are obvious participants in this kind of marriage, they are hardly alone. When widows of Revolutionary or Civil War veterans were able to claim a pension, many marriages occurred between needy young women and elderly men. Some individuals married for status, or to share in the power of politically influential families; marriage to nobility was a way "for new-money families" to bypass "old-money" social controls. For some would-be immigrants, "marriage was their only immigration option and, frequently, their only path to safety." Marrying for a green card, Zug notes, "remains perfectly legal." The author documents ways that transactional marriages have increased the risk of exploitation and abuse, but she finds, too, that forced marriages at times have protected women, and their children, "from abandonment and destitution." She looks at the pros and cons of intermarriage. A white man marrying a Native American woman could gain rights to tribal resources; for a Native woman, intermarriage could mean access to valuable government benefits. Because of spousal privilege, some hasty marriages become an effective criminal defense strategy. In revealing the complex consequences of marrying, Zug concludes that marriage, at best, "is a Band-Aid that Americans have used when society is too sexist, too racist, or just too lazy to implement better solutions." A fresh, engaging social history.

      COPYRIGHT(2023) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • Booklist

      December 1, 2023
      People get married all the time. While marrying for love may be a romantic concept embraced by contemporary popular norms, this history of marriage in the U.S. explores lots of other reasons couples get together, including financial gain, green cards, and increased social standing. Writing from a legal viewpoint, Zug (Buying a Bride, 2016) shows how legislation and financial policies regarding property ownership, taxation, inheritance, and even child custody have traditionally favored men and cites court cases documenting how laws designed to protect women's rights gradually entered the legal system. American society and values are steeped in the expectation of marriage, whether casting moral aspersions on spinsters and bachelors or giving preferential treatment to married couples in instances ranging from frontier land grabs to the exploitation of minorities, Henry Ford's salary schedules, and current studies indicating married individuals get better medical treatment, and married prisoners (both men and women) get less severe sentences. Gold diggers, bigamists, prenups, breach of promise suits, alimony: it's all here, wrapped up in an engaging and accessible account.

      COPYRIGHT(2023) Booklist, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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